Riding the rollercoaster.....again

I have definitely decided that life is one long, long rollercoaster full of ups and downs, loops and sudden breathtaking drops.
I once had to do a filming project on a rant- a subject that really got under my skin. It took me days to think of a subject, and eventually I settled on ranting about my nosy neighbour's because they were always trying to get juicy gossip out of me and my brothers about my mum and dads divorce. In the end it was a half-hearted rant, because really I didn't give a flying **** what the neighbour's thought, but today approximately five years on if I was asked to do that project again, I would truly excel at it.

I suppose it's part of being a grown up and a parent, the part in you that becomes more wingey, more cynical, more, well overall more aware of life and the crap thats happening around you.

So far maternity leave for me this time has been a dream. It's had it's up and downs but so far the bubble hasn't smothered her younger brother, and said younger brother is growing up so fast and already at eight weeks old has moved on from his real baby baby stage. The only thing thats getting me and in fact my whole household down is that little old nuisance- money.

The problem with it is that no matter how much we have we always need more and about ten minutes ago it just hit me like a dagger in the heart. Himself works full time, as a well paid, probably undernourished and most definitely sleep deprived lorry driver. I (usually, when not having children) work four days a week as a magazine editor. Not well paid, not usually sleep deprived and positively NOT undernourished. Bearing these two facts in mind (the two full time workers, not the nourishment factor) why then when I was changing my bedlinen today did I realise that we don't own one duvet cover that is the same pattern as the pillowcases. Thats correct not one bed set do we own.
On realising this I texted himself to invite him to comment on the fact and got a smug reply 'Eh, buy one.' That was it, I just had to phone him and said I couldn't purchase such a luxury because, and I was only surmising, I figured he wanted to eat for the rest of the month, I also presumed the two mortgages we have probably needed paying (A-totally-nother story- in brief, we foolishly bought a plot of land to build on, couldn't sell his mums house to finance build and now have to pay for stupid bit of grass and a portion of his mums mortgage which we used to finance deposit for aforementioned stupid bit of cow feeding land. Bitter? maybe).
And there we have it, this is only two rivers our money flows down there are more, many, many more and at the minute I don't know where it will end, unlike this ranting blog which is ending now.